to quote...

two glass houses, twenty stones...fourteen yellow, six of blue, - could it be worse? quite doubtful...

quickly: RE: trip

What I thought was important just flat-out died immediately, but everything else on the trip was awesome. Not as much time swimming at the beach as I'd have liked, but really, when is it ever enough? I'm working on pictures, and whatnot, so... I leave you with the following quote from George Washington: "oh."

ummm...

so... wow, really? no posts in that long? :( bah, well... so... I'm headed out to Nicaragua on Thursday night... arriving Friday morning for breakfast at the hotel across the street like always... so... gallo pinto soon!!!! :)

...okay...
that's all for now, - more laundry so I can pack... should have gotten a haircut, but didn't ... mmmm, I want dragonfruit (pitahaya) - just saw some on tv.... I'm hoping someone back home saved some in the freezer for me. :)

=MARS=

Shut up.

A BLT is NOT a sandwich, its a bunch of toppings on a bun... stop lying to yourself!

so listen..

ladies, as it turns out, I'm pretty much convinced all I'm looking for is someone that will allow me to hug them regularly...soooo.... if you're willing to meet up with me once in a while and ... you know... allow that kind of thing... maybe we could work something out.. no? hmmm?

let me know.

so...

well that, as they say, is that.

sosinosiquewhat

bah.

whether

Today I walked around Costco(r) with a box of 80 Depends(r) underwear (size small/medium) for about an hour and a half. I purchased them, so of course a younger girl comes over to help put things in the cart at the register... and then I waited 'till dark to get them out of my car... because honestly... that's not likely the kind of rumor I want people thinking of when I see them at the pool.

:P

oh, by the way

In a few weeks I'm heading off to Nicaragua again... ...and this is the first time since probably 1993 that I go without taking someone with me... ...so I have no idea what to expect of the trip or what I'll be doing. I realized long ago that I often use familiar faces as a crutch (won't go to parties where I don't know someone, etc.), but I've been doing the same for trips to the homeland... I'd ask if this was wrong, but I know I wouldn't be asking if I didn't think it was. So anyway, what to do, what to do... Its not like I'm not looking forward to it, or like I'm not going to see people I know there; I don't think this is a symptom of my disliking being the center of attention, that I can deal with... on trips though, and any outing really, I prefer to have someone else with whims to cater to... ...the young lady I dated in high school noticed this one day at the county fair (that's right, I went to the county fair... but this was Miami... so... not quite po-dunk)... anyway, we were (the group) at the fair and I kept asking what everyone wanted to do... and kept trying to make sure we did all of it so everyone would be happy - I never put my own wishes into the thing. I don't know that its a horrible thing, I still enjoy myself, and am pleased to do the things I enjoy - but I don't feel that strongly about most things that I'd be upset if we didn't. I don't substitute someone else's wants for my own - I just prefer not to impose the things I don't feel strongly about on others. Even the things I feel strongly about, I try to keep to myself if others don't agree; I mean, who's to say I'm right?

What else?

Hrm... ...still on this subject - I honestly don't care that often, I honestly prefer to go with what someone else wants when I don't have a preference. Stop judging me. :P - I think I'm fine with that.

On the subject of the upcoming trip though - I am a little bit disappointed that after so many years of going back, that I'm a little apprehensive about not taking a buffer with me. So... a little more upset with myself than the situation.

Whatever; it'll be fine, and I'll go to the beach and ride horse as planned. This will end no other way.

Anyone want to come with me?

abort

...was browsing through an old hard drive & found the aborted beginning of a short story; I now know that the urge it mentions is a symptom of my bloglaziness.... which is also the cause of my posting this instead of actually recording something new. :)

Do you ever get the feeling you’ve gone and done something behind your back that you don’t even want yourself to know about? For years and years I’ve been haunted by this constant feeling that I’m signed up for a class and am purposefully not showing up to it. Sometimes, when I’m dreaming, I’ll walk by a classroom full of people I know and suddenly realize that I’m supposed to be in there with them, but I’ll duck under the window in the door and hide. “So good to see you once again, I thought that you were hiding; you thought that I had run away: chasing the tail of dogma.” Sometimes, when I listen to TOOL, I have an inkling of what the matter is. Apparently I don’t know. The general feeling in the bones is that I should really be elsewhere right now. Always right now instead of, say, in twenty minutes. Did I miss something? An off-ramp? Did I sleep through an entire day and now deep inside my soul knows that I’m constantly a day behind on everything that’s going on, and my life is just the thrown-together attempt to live as though I’m caught up? Is this just insecurity? And why do I keep getting the urge to write down lyrics to the songs I’m listening to?

ambushed...

Oh! Before I forget, we went hiking about Rock Springs Run today and there were 3 bears :) (a mom and 2 cubs) running parallel to us. :) Its the first time I see live bears in the wild in Florida... so, red-letter day for me. :)

tasty pie

There's now a farmer's market every tuesday near work, so today I got a nice steak potato and onion pie... unfortunately, it is not the hot pocket variety... so, of course, off I drove to do fieldwork with a bowl and two plastic forks, eating a very tasty pie. :)

...spinning...

I love the little typhoon of water and leaves that forms in the bed of my truck when the automatic car wash is blowing it dry...

the thing with...

..so, I can handle the life so far, but today I wandered into the frozen food section (which I never do) in search of something, and realized that, one day, I might be in there on purpose every shopping trip, looking for a week's groceries, giving up on cooking and nutrition, thinking lean cuisine and whatnot are the same as "healthy eating," and having forgotten that there is a different way to be.

as a side note,

nevermind. I'll look it up.

(edit) - so, apparently nothing I was thinking of seems to have gotten across in those words... ...wandering into that section it was less about nutrition (which for some bizzare reason appears to have been on my mind), and more about the frozen food section being the last sign that I've stopped trying to plan regular meals for more than just one.

pencil it in

:) sometimes, the notes between the lines you read me, I put there on my own.

sometimes, we just talk to ourselves, no?

tag!

I keep only one pin/button, it is small and is attached to my backpack. quote: "My world is cold and without hope"

v-d day!

I'd like to take this moment, in case I had not previously done so, to declare my lurve for the poetry of Charles Bukowski.

as it turns out....

apparently shopping after drinking might be a bad idea.
as is bloggin after drinking.

should anything else arise, I'll let you know.

"...just like everybody else does..."

so yeah.

Nicaragua, winter 2007

here're the pics from the latest trip: http://flickr.com/photos/viejano/collections/72157603806567189/